Busy Doing Nothing (But Doing It Brilliantly)

It’s funny, isn’t it? You spend most of your life thinking you are one specific type of person… and then you move to a different country and discover you were only ever a location-specific edition of yourself.

Same hardware. Very different operating system.

For those who are new here, a quick bit of backstory: Bob and I both come from the UK transport industry. We can still bore for Britain (and now France) on buses, coaches, infrastructure, and fleet logistics. Don’t encourage us. That part of our brains hasn't changed.

But emotionally? I am a completely different model.

In the UK, I used to openly admit I was a total control freak. These days? I think I’m more of an occasional control wannabe.

I still like a plan—let’s not get silly—but if things go wrong, I’m far more likely to wind down than spin out. If you’d told UK-me that was possible, I’d have scheduled an urgent meeting to discuss it.

Project Managing a Move to France

When we decided to relocate to France, I treated it like the ultimate corporate project. Folders? We had folders for everything. Colour-coded. Labelled. Allocated trailer space. I genuinely thought I’d anticipated every single piece of paperwork.

Reader, I had not met French bureaucracy.

There were more folders. Many, many more folders.

But at the time, I was on it like a car bonnet. Project management mode was fully activated. I was working full-time with a long commute, scheduling tasks for Bob and OG like a slightly over-caffeinated operations director. I kept a notebook by my bed for 3am worries. If a panic woke me up, it got written down to stop it pacing around my brain. We had a master to-do list: structured, managed, controlled.

Well. Sort of.

If you’ve followed our adventures for a while, you’ll know that France gently laughs in the face of your master plan.

From 100 Jobs an Afternoon to a French Pace of Life

I built a career on the belief that if you want something done, you give it to the busiest person in the room. I was always that person.

So, what’s changed?

We still work—just not at full throttle. I still get stressed occasionally—just not about work. I don't feel sick from pressure anymore, and I don’t lie awake mentally drafting tomorrow’s battle plan. In fact, I’m probably unrecognisable to some of our UK friends.

I’m no longer scanning the horizon for the next thing to conquer. These days, I’m just as likely to lie in bed watching the birds follow Bob around the pool as he cleans it, as I am to leap up at dawn for a power walk.

(Full disclosure: it’s mostly the bird-watching, but as pool boys go...)

OG says I’m a completely different mother to the one she knew in the UK. Apparently, "old me" could complete 100 jobs in an afternoon, delegate another 20, and still produce a roast dinner worthy of applause. Now? If we’re not working, I consider finishing one solid task a total triumph.

And do you know what? I’m absolutely fine with that.

Learning to Breathe Through French Bureaucracy

France has taught me some invaluable lessons:

• That "no" is often just the starting point of a conversation.

• That official government websites are guidelines, not gospel.

• That your local impôts (tax office) can—and will—request a completely different set of documents that must be translated, stamped, and less than three months old.

And here’s the growth bit: they can. It’s their system, not mine. There is absolutely no prize for fighting it.

So now? I shrug. I fetch the document. I book the appointment. I wait. I breathe. I’ve discovered that not trying to force the world to spin at my speed is deeply, deliciously relaxing.

That doesn’t mean I won’t occasionally throw a small hissy fit. I’m still me, and French bureaucracy can test the patience of a saint. Mais ça en vaut la peine (but it's worth it). The blood pressure numbers certainly agree.

Choosing Presence Over Pressure

Turns out, being "busy doing nothing" isn’t actually nothing at all.

It’s space. It’s perspective. It’s choosing presence over pressure. It’s watching birds instead of chasing deadlines, and building a life instead of simply managing one.

💬 Over to you: If you’ve made a big leap or moved abroad, did your operating system change too? And if you’re still in the planning stage... who are you hoping to become on the other side? Let me know in the comments!

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Jen x